It was inevitable. Taxes for 2015 had to be filed and paid this week; a responsibility neither my husband nor I like to do. Tell me if this sounds familiar: towards the end of January, the receipt files find their way to the front of the cabinet. February we pretend we've done something proactive towards organizing our paperwork when in reality, nothing has been touched. By March, drawers have been cleaned out, all necessary forms are collected, and everything sits ready to be reviewed but somehow, neither one of us wants to make the ultimate move of looking at the numbers until absolutely forced. A slight tension hangs in the air with the faint resemblance of a day-old hang over (heads still hurt and internal voices chastise everyone involved from government to ourselves).
But this year, I wanted it to be different. Instead of following the same patterns of resentment, frustration, and procrastination, what if I tried a small experiment to alter my perception and shine a more yogic way of acceptance on this bleak task? This experiment is actually a technique I use in yoga classes and private lessons. It's called "Recapitulation" or summarizing the past in order to bring everything to the present. The technique helps the mind and energetic body to connect in the here and now versus hanging onto past events or worrying about what's to come in the future. Here's how I started:
As I recorded my numbers into columns for various expenditures, I reflected upon that number and noticed what memories came up. Where was I when I made that purchase or gave that donation? What can I remember doing that week? I started with December and before I even entered October's numbers, I had recreated moments of my life like a mini movie in my head. Each month gave me a fuller version of this movie. By the time I reached January, I reflected on how many events happened during 2015; places travelled, workshops attended or given, home improvements, business growth, family growth, personal growth... Then I took a deep breath in and out, feeling whatever came up with each item and then letting it go. The entire recapitulation took about 30 minutes but its affects lasted for days.
The actual tax form preparation took on an entirely different feel after this exercise. I had a sense of awe about the work my family and I did during these past twelve months. I could detach a bit more from the frustration about getting "taxed" and instead, be present with what I currently have. Recapitulation didn't change what happened in the past. It highlighted where I left my "power" in forms of thoughts, memories, emotions, and yes, even money. I can't reclaim the dollars spent or earned in those moments but I can regain the energies I chose to put into those times. From this recollection, I no longer dwell half in and half out of this present moment. Recapitulation helped me see patterns that I can alter if I choose for the future. It also helped me acknowledge how fast life happened and where the indelible marks affected my subtle bodies.
This experiment didn't make tax preparation faster or easier. But it did bring clarity and freedom to my mind and body. Writing the check to the IRS wasn't fun but it did feel different this time around. We're already a quarter way through 2016 and life seems to be just as fast as that mini movie that I created during this process. So, in light of my new sense of clarity, I choose to be present and aware of my actions in this moment and experience my power to be here. How are you choosing to be present?
For more information about the Recapitulation process, check out the following article on BeingEnergy.com